Borderline Retarded

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Last night, for the first time, I had a dream that made me laugh so hard it woke me up. My husband thought there might be something wrong. "Are you all right?" he asked. I told him I was just laughing! My husband has always amazed me when he would laugh in his sleep. It always made me smile too, even though I didn't know what was so funny. I wasn't actually laughing out loud, but my whole body was racked with laughter.

I was dreaming about watching Jon Stewart on the Daily Show, and one of his guests was wearing a blue blazer that was covered in orange cat hair. He stood up from his chair, and it was all over the place. I think it was Jon's reaction to the cat hair that really set me laughing. How odd!!

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

This was the actual caption beneath this photo:

Anna Nicole Smith (left)

Monday, October 23, 2006

The Nut Tree has re-opened in Vacaville! I took my kids there this weekend and we had a great time. My dad bought us all season passes so we can go every weekend if we want to. Old baby is finally big enough to go on all the rides, and he enjoys most of them. He's still unsure of the roller coaster and the airplane ride. I did finally convince him to ride the merry go round. Of course, his other option was going home, so I suppose I stacked the odds in my favor!

The Nut Tree was a place I loved to go as a kid. It was nothing spectacular, but it had a small train that pulled you out to the airport where you could get off and play on a 1/2 size model of a real airplane. My Grandpa also owned a Cesna; the first time I ever flew was with my 2 grandads from the Nut Tree Airport to the Napa County airport when I was 9 years old. I don't think I will ever forget that day! They had an awesome pumpkin patch at Halloween time, complete with a scarecrow contest, pumpkin ice cream and tethered hot air balloon rides. I dreamed every year of creating a scarecrow for the contest, but I was never that creative!

They also had these giant wooden hobby horses, and a play wall that you could run behind and open and shut doors, and stick your head out to have your picture taken. They had the neatest toy store, with lots of timy wind up robots and stuff like that. I also remember popcorn balls and giagantic gingerbread cookies you could decorate.

It's not the same, but the new Nut Tree is good in it's own way. It will be a place that hopefully my kids will have fond memories of as well.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

I've just read an article that says 49% of Americans think they are worse of than their parents, even though yearly income (adjusted for inflation) is 42% higher than our counterparts in the 1960's.

I know for my part, I feel like my family and I are traveling very similar paths as did my grandparents and parents before us. I spent endless hours with my grandmother and she talked about buying their first home for $8,000.00, my grandfather losing his job just days before the birth of one of their children, penny pinching and buying Christmas presents for the children only every other year and even living with relatives when times were especially tough.

My parents were still in college when they got married and had their first child. My mom worked her way through college because her father was adamant that he wouldn't spend money on educating her because she was just going to get married and be a housewife anyway. My father bought his first house in Napa in 1974. He didn't buy the house next door on the corner lot that he really wanted because it cost $5,000.00 more. They never bought a new car until I was a teenager, and drove it until it finally fell apart. Other than coveting the "Guess" jeans all the other girls wore, we never wanted for anything. My mom taught us to be creative and we made our own birthday cards and gifts for family and friends.

Talking to my grandmother during especially difficult times in my life was always so helpful, and I sure miss her wisdom today. I could talk to her about anything, because the chances were good that she had been through the exact same circumstance in her life. Talking to my mother is not so helpful, because she turns into a self-help book and tries to get all psychological on me. That, and I firmly believe she has a mental disorder which prevents her from recalling any event in our family life accurately!

I would say that my family and I have a better life than my grandparents and parents, as far as the internet and cell phones and debit cards, what have you. As long as those things don't become a replacement for spending quality time together as a family. I am sure I will refuse to allow my children to have their own TV's, cell phones and computers. But, who's to say what our life will be like in 10 years. Maybe denying my kids these things will actually keep them behind. It will be an interesting balancing act.

I feel like I have everything I ever wanted.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006


New baby has surprised me twice.

This weekend, he started sitting up all on his own.

He also pulled himself from sitting on the floor, to standing.

Both of these things were so matter of fact to him but to his daddy and I, those moments were pure magic.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

We took the kids to Traintown in Sonoma last Sunday. What a strange little place that was. My husband mentioned while we were crammed onto the train "what a cool place this would have been to come and smoke pot. Just climb over the fence and hide out." Hm, the place did kind of smell of urine, so I wonder if there aren't some vagrants living in the little miniature mine shafts.

On Monday, old baby's day care was closed and his Papa and Tutu watched him all day. I picked him up at their place in Vacaville and we went to Outback Steakhouse for dinner. A new development since Sunday is that my three year old now wants to cut his own food. With a KNIFE. I try and remain calm as he carefully slices towards his preshus little fingers. He was sawing through the little loaf of bread they serve when you sit down. It was totally worth it just to see the look of horror on my mom's face the whole time he was wielding that knife. It was great.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

It has been busy around here!! I just finished up with an audit yesterday. That will give you grey hairs, let me tell you! The auditor was very nice though. I have found all of the auditors I have worked with over the years to be nice people. My friend Maria did have one lousy auditor. He was from the TTB (Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau, used to be known as the ATF) and from all accounts was on a day pass from the state hospital. Maria said he kept pulling little scraps of paper out of his pockets, looking at them, and squirreling them away again while he talked. She can't even recount that day without a few martinis in her. She was so pissed off after this guy left, she slammed all the doors and left for the rest of the day. I guess the auditor forgot to tell her something and came back into the office, and the staff were actually scared there would be bloodshed. One of the owners called the TTB and the auditor never came back. He was replaced by someone much better suited to work with humans.

My husband and I went out for dinner last Friday night, just the two of us. It was very nice, and relaxing. It has been a rough couple of weeks. Old baby is having a difficult time getting the swing of our new routine. I think the biggest upset is that in between my husband starting a new job and new baby with a babysitter, he has graduated up to the next class at school. He is with all of the other three year olds now, and he is having some trouble warming up to everything.

I can't believe how much that kid tries to get away with! We have to be on alert constantly for his unsavory behavior. He talks back something fierce. Well, we are nipping that in the bud. He seems to be responding well, but he is also having trouble going to bed at night. He stays awake too late, and sometimes wakes his brother up in the process. No wonder he can be a monster some mornings. There is always the guilty stabs of pain too, knowing that everything would be so much more peaceful if I were staying home, and not having to wake up the kids so I can get to work. However, we would be living under a freeway overpass if I wasn't working, so I guess maybe "peaceful" is relative!

We were able to enjoy dinner out last night for a friend's birthday. That was great - they have a 3 year old as well and it so much fun to see them together! New baby got passed around the table from hand to hand, charming everyone with his smile, eating everyone's food. He is such a schmoozer! He lost both of his socks by the end of the night, and the cutest thing I have ever seen is my husband holding the baby, tickling his little feet with his beard. The baby laughed so hard, I thought his sides were going to split. I told my friend Wren that I think an egg popped out of my ovary when I saw that. I thoroughly grossed out half the table!