Borderline Retarded

Monday, August 22, 2005

March of the Penguins

I thought it would be great fun on Sunday to take my little guy to the movie for the very first time and see "March of the Penguins". I could not convince my better half to come along, so mommy was alone as we entered the giant multiplex in Fairfield. All went very well. We walked down about a mile of corridor to get to our theater, during which time my son flitted off to join any other random band of little people swarming around. When we got to our theater, mommy and young boy walked for 1/2 an hour up and down the stairs, up and down, up and down, up and down. Then, the previews started. I tried to get little guy to settle down in a chair. I offered him water and snacks. But, to no avail. He just wanted to wonder up and down the stairs. Up and down, up and down. Granted, mommy is pregnant, and started to tire out a bit during our 800th lap.

Sweating profusely, I tried soooo hard to get that little guy to sit down and watch the movie. He would sit down, then I would sit down. That is where the problems started!! Apparently, mommy is not to sit down at all during this theater presentation. He ran around alternately screaming his head off, and laughing at the screen. Finally, I decide it's just better to leave. Alas, this is when the entire contents of my purse decide to up end over onto the floor. I quickly grab whatever I could find, and look up to see an angry gentlemen motioning for me to "get my child". I run over, pick up my screaming, kicking child, and head out the nearest exit.

I think what was worst about this whole experience, is that for the first time, I felt like "that woman". You know, "What's wrong with That Woman, can't she control her child?" Or, "Why would That Woman bring a young child to a G-rated movie about penguins, My God!"

The crying during the car ride home helped immensely (mine, not the boy's).

3 Comments:

  • At least you aren't That Woman who took her 2-year-old to Lord of the Rings, the 10pm showing, and who kept shushing said scared shitless 2-year-old every time a scary scene (read: EVERY scene in that movie to a 2-year-old) came on and he started to bawl...

    By Blogger PSUMommy, at 4:23 PM  

  • You can't always predict how kids will react/behave. I don't have kids but have much younger sisters. When they were younger - sometimes they behaved really well, better than you'd expect for their age and other times, I couldn't escape with them fast enough. March of the penguins seems fine, not like the 6-10 yr olds I saw in Wedding Crashers with their irresonsible parents. Don't be too hard on yourself.

    By Blogger Petra, at 6:39 PM  

  • at least you weren't "that woman" with the 3 year old in Spiderman 2 who SCREAMED so loud right thru the whole movie that people were yelling (including me, which is rare) to "SHUT THAT *#&^$%^ CHILD UP". About 10 mins toward the end, she took him out.

    I wanted a refund - i didn't hear one word of dialogue due to the screaming of the kid and/or the other victim cinema-goers. Damnit.

    By Blogger Squishi, at 10:50 PM  

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